Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
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