The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Randomize
