Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
Randomize
