the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
Randomize
