Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
they call him Oral-B. enough said
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Randomize