this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
Randomize