its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
pop tarts are not kleenex
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
