i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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