in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
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