the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
At least life still wants to fuck me.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Randomize
