Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
Randomize
