I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
Randomize
