Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
