I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
And my parents said I crawled through the house
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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