it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
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