dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
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