Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize