party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
Randomize
