Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
i am craving dick and cupcakes
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
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