you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
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