I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
Randomize
