How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
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