Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
Randomize
