also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
