all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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