Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
