I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
Randomize
