Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
