2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
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