nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
Thanks for being the best husband and reassuring my fuck buddy that you're comfortable with my adultery. You da real MVP.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
Randomize
