I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
Randomize
