I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Randomize
