from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
