Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Randomize
