Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
Good news!! I can adult!! ๐ turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ๐ญ๐
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
Unless my dick prospects improve this yearโs Halloween costume will include panties with โDTFโ written on them and a push up bra
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