4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
im drinking this country out of the recession.
Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
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