i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
