If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
