Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize
