At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
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