i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
Randomize
