Kareoke will never be a sober sport
fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Randomize
