Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
I wish i was in the wii world.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
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