I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
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