I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
Randomize