This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
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