yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize
