We're like a lot better than the average bears
somebody snuck up and got me drunk
you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
Randomize
