? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
Randomize
