I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
Randomize
